TCOBaG: The Self-Starter Myth?

We are going to talk about some of those people you
may envy, those ‘I can do it by myself and for myself’
types. But, are they really all they seem to be?

I think not.

“Self-starters, a myth?”

People who know me, know me well even, are
often surprised to hear me say that I am lazy.

Yes, lazy. Me.

Lazy is my potential, and at times, it comes
out more than others.

They always say I am being modest, that I work
hard all the time, writing, speaking, teaching,
and that they do not know anyone with more drive
and that they wish they were a natural ‘self-starter’
like me.

I laugh. Lightly 🙂

No one is truly a ‘self-starter.’

Yep. It is completely true.

Don’t knock yourself for ‘not having the drive’ or
not having the willpower (we talked about that, right?)
to stay on track, get everything done, and keep at it.

We are all, including myself, subject to pressures.

These pressures motivate us, for lack of a better term,
to go on, to do, to complete tasks, work, goals.

The difference is in where the pressure comes from.

We see people who we think are truly self-starters,
taking the initiative, not needing to be coaxed,
goaded, or pushed, to get their work or their lives

What we don’t see, is how they think.

For me, I know, I can be lazy. Really lazy, and
a professional procrastinator.

I rely on certain pressures to keep me from falling
into that trap. They are not always obvious to others
but they nonetheless still exist and it is not ‘just
me’ doing the pushing.

There are always pressures.

It might only be a deadline.

The day a bill is due. Or simply knowing that you must
work, and usually work well, to get paid, in order to
pay those bills.

Maybe it is only thinking about what others might
say if you fail, or don’t deliver where you should.

Or what they might think, or even what they expect.

Maybe it is remembering the poor condition your life
was in before, remembering those pep talks you gave
yourself about how you were not going to live that
way forever.

So, you see the pressure is often internalized and
not easily seen.

But I assure you the pressure exists, and no one is
really just naturally doing all that they can.

Everyone is reacting to these pressures, external and
internal, in order to fulfill their own promise.

So, what can you do?

Find the right pressure.

Maybe you need someone to stay after you. Remind you
of your goals, your promises.

Maybe you need to reflect a bit on why you really want
to succeed, why you really must succeed. What will the
pain be like if you don’t?

Maybe you are like me, and you need a little of both 🙂

That’s okay, too.

Just find the right button to push, keep pushing it
when it is needed, and you will continue on the path
to achieving your goals.

I promise.

I am also available for ‘seat-of-the-pants-dusting’ on
occasion 🙂

One thing to keep in mind about ‘motivation’ is that – other things, other people, and outside forces do not motivate us, we motivate ourselves.

We are responsible for taking, or not taking, action.

No outside force is capable of this.

Now, that said, if you’re hanging by your fingertips over a boiling lava pit, you will be motivated to hang on.

But, it’s not the pit motivating you. It is your own fear of the consequences and your desire to avoid them that is the true mechanism for hanging on.

Sure, that heat rising up off the pit affects you, but the motivation is strictly yours.

If you choose to act, and especially if you choose to act as though your life depends on it, you will find that you achieve more. Much more.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Just checkin' to see if you're human... *